This will be controversial but let’s get into it.
Part of the reason why it took me a long time to adjust in Sweden was the dating part. It wasn’t working for me because I have a different outlook when it comes to what a man should be in my life. Or the kind of men I am willing to entertain.
MANNERS. I Rachel Otieno refuse to be in the company of a man with bad manners!
Am I the only one who cannot tolerate men who have nothing to offer? It is for this basic reason that I made it a principle to never settle for less than I deserve. Any man who thinks this is too much has a second longer than he should´ve in your company.
I believe that if a man comes into your life, it should improve for the better. P/S I don’t consider his looks or personality as part of the offering. I mean material stuff. I mean money, property, investments, rent or basic maintenance. Ladies if a man cannot offer the bare minimum what is he doing in your life? Aren’t you better of alone? You are better of focusing on your life goals alone than entertaining a man who brings nothing on your table. Unless you don’t know your value but I am here to remind you, that a man needs you in his life more than you think, it doesn’t matter how great you think he is.
I remember this time I went on a coffee date with a Swedish guy who ordered his coffee and proceeded to pay without turning to ask what I was taking yet I was right behind him. I ended the date indefinitely by just walking past him and not looking back. I personally think it is disrespectful to ask a woman out on a date and expect her to pick the bill. If you are broke, save up then ask her out when you are ready.
Think about it, we all know how much it costs to be a woman. Men step in the shower and they have a shampoo that is a conditioner, body wash and lotion at the same time. Yet just to wash your hair…. you have electricity bill (blow drying), shampoo, conditioner, treatment and all kinds of oils to nourish your flourish, right? Without mentioning the stress that it comes with, leave a lone makeup or dressing.
A man will expect you to look sexy, be waxed, smell good, be smart and entertain him at the same time. What makes it okay for him to think he can ask you on a date and expect you to divide the bill? I am not saying a man should pay for me to look good, I do that for myself. But if you want my company looking package then you should have curtsey and pay right?
Let’s be fair here. How is it okay to share a bill when it costs me 10* times more meals to get ready? Pay the bill and give me the balance or I will send an invoice at the end of the date.
I get picked on for dating a man for 2 years and not being married. It seems like a man is doing me a favour by making me his wife. This kind of reasoning doesn’t resonate with me because I don’t look at myself that way. I think any man who gets to marry me will be honoured. I therefore get to choose who and when it is time. For now we will start by him meeting my unrealistic expectations.
Ladies don’t fall in the trap of trying to make a man settle. Let him work hard to make you want to settle. If he thinks your expectations are unrealistic just leave him and be in the company of men who are willing to meet those standards without a question. In fact, if you were to ask me, men have the most unrealistic expectations of women for centuries and it won´t change anytime soon. So why would you compromise yours sis? Why would you settle for a man who has nothing to offer?